How To Get Him To Call You Back

It's sad, but not every guy you go out with will call you back. Unless, of course, you have the qualities of the kind of woman that every man is looking for. And I'm talking EVERY man – no exceptions! And I can teach you exactly HOW to be this woman in my "love primer"

How come some men never call you back, even after having a fantastic date with you?  Could it be that most men simply aren't interested in dating a woman more than once?  Or is it because most men simply don't have what it takes to commit to a more serious relationship?  Sadly, it's often even simpler than that.  After years of studying men and relationships, I've realized that when men don't call you back, it's simply because they DON'T FEEL IT for you.

The date may have been fantastic for YOU, but there's no guarantee he felt the same way!  Oh, and by the way -- texting him to call you back won't fix the problem.  In fact, it'll even scare him away --likely because men don't like women who nag them, especially even after you've only had a grand total of ONE date so far!  Here's the thing -- if he didn't call you back, then you may have done something during the date that turned him off.

It could be one of many things, but in today's newsletter, we'll be talking about the 3 of the biggest mistakes that we women make during the first date.  Ready? Let's get started before your
NEXT date comes along!

MISTAKE #1 - TALKING WAY TOO MUCH!

It's true, even I'll admit it – we women love talking. We love sharing our experiences and telling stories to everyone we meet.  It's THERAPEUTIC to us -- that's why we love meeting our girlfriends for hours
of girl talk, making everyone else in the cafe roll their eyes!  The problem is that we tend to bring
this habit into our dates with men.

And as a result, we tend to talk way too much during the first date -- and he ends up listening to (or more accurately, putting up with) you droning on and on and on.  Naturally, that turns him off -- WAY
off!  If you want him to call you back after the date, you'll have to learn the art of LISTENING, too. After all, men like to talk, too -- and he may even have a few interesting stories to tell you.

So learn how to carry a conversation -- stop, listen, don't butt in with your own stories, and ask follow-up questions, encouraging him to finish his story!  When he knows that you're a great person to talk to, he's going to feel more compelled to call you up after the date -- and even schedule a second date.  Isn't that what you want to happen? ;)

MISTAKE #2 - YOU TALK ABOUT THE WRONG THINGS!

First dates are supposed to be fun, but  that's not easy as it sounds.  At the very beginning, things can be
pretty awkward, and that's why it's easiest to talk about the "little things" first -- such as where you
worked, what kind of job you guys had, etc.  This if fine, of course -- except when you take the "introductions" a little too far.  I'll explain with a story...A client of mine, let's call her "Penny," is currently a member of a politician's campaign team.  Now you know how divisive American politics can be --and to be effective, you'll need to be as involved in politics as you can be.  Penny's mistake was when she took her introductions a bit too far.   After introducing herself as a politician's campaign manager, she went on to talk about her political views, the problems facing the country's political landscape... and many other boring things like that.

Needless to say, Penny's politics turned off all her dates. Penny was an attractive, confident woman -- but she simply didn't know how to carry a date.  So when she told me about her problem, I advised her to lighten up, and use her experience in politics to her advantage during her first dates. For instance,
instead of introducing her job to the guy and then talking more about it, she could say something like:

"I'm a political campaign manager, but seriously, who likes politics? Why don't we talk about the WEATHER, instead?"  Penny tried it on her very next date -- and got a wonderful response!  In one swoop, she did three things right-- she avoided launching into a boring discussion, she tickled her date's sense of humor, and she gave the impression that she's fun and easygoing, which is something ALL men look for!  So here's the takeaway -- focus on keeping the date fun. That's your best chance of getting him to call you back as soon as he gets home.

MISTAKE #3 - YOU LIKED HIM TOO MUCH!

Another client of mine, MI, was elated when the guy of her dreams asked her out to dinner. She had a swell time, and at the end of the date, the guy promised he'd call her again in a few days.  But guess what? He never called.   And finally, MI got fed up with waiting and called him herself. What he told her
shocked her to no end:  "I don't think we're good for each other."

When MI told me her story, I asked her to give me every single detail. And when she did, I finally found the problem --she simply liked him too much, and she showed it during the date.  She sat too close to him, she laughed at every single thing he said, and she never took her eyes off of him.  Now, you'd think he'd appreciate the attention, right?  Wrong!

Remember, guys go on first dates for FUN -- not to build a relationship. And MI made the mistake of thinking that the first date WAS the first step of their "future" relationship.  So when the guy realized MI was actually in LOVE with him, he felt the pressure -- and left.  But why did he promise to call MI back?
Simple -- to get away from her.  It was the only way for him to end the date as politely as he could -- and then disappear.

Now I know how RUDE the guy may sound like, but trust me -- if you approach every date the way MI did, then don't expect too much.  My advice to MI is the same advice I'm going to give you today -- don't push the relationship!  Don't rush into the "next level" – just focus on having a great time with him. Focus on being fun, attractive, confident -- in other words, focus on being the woman that EVERY GUY is
looking for! -Alexandra Fox-