How Men Think

Have you ever gotten tired of trying to figure men out? It's true -- women are from Venus, and men are from Mars. But there IS a way to bring the gender gap back down to Earth!   Do men frustrate you?

Do you spend most of your alone time trying to figure them out?  Do some of the things they do annoy you to no end?  It's true -- men DO think very differently from us. And yes, it's frustrating that we sometimes have to go so far out of our way to connect with them!

But unfortunately, it's exactly these misunderstandings and misconceptions that ruin relationships. Yes, men think differently. But when you try to convince them to think like you, it's a recipe for disaster.

When you try to change the way he acts, thinks, and feels, that's when problems start!  Here's the quick gist of this article -- DON'T assume that men think (or should think) like you.  Believe me, I've met many women who complained to me, "Alex, if he only listened to me, and if he only followed the things I told him to do, we'd still be in a relationship right now!"

Sorry, that's not how things work. And in today's article, we'll discuss some of the more important differences between men and women.  Because when you know how men think when it comes to love and relationships, you'll avoid a LOT of the most common relationship-ending problems!  Let's start with a simple fact:

MEN ARE SIMPLE!

I hate to admit it, but yes, we DO tend to over-complicate things sometimes.  When something happens in our lives, we tend to ask "why." We sometimes spend hours asking "why!"

When things are getting stressful at work, we think, "Why are things getting stressful? Does someone hate me? Do I need to hire a shrink or a business coach?"

Sometimes we put even the smallest things under the microscope. When we wake up with dark circles under our eyes, we think, "Why do I have eyebags? Am I sick? Do I need to sleep more? Do I have to change my diet? Will the world really end before Christmas next year?"  I exaggerate, but you get the idea!

Men, on the other hand, don't do that.  They don't over-analyze. Their thought patterns are actually much simpler than you think!  If they're stressed out at work, they de-stress.

They sleep, they go out for a few drinks, they play video games, they surf for photos of beautiful women.  If they wake up with dark circles under their eyes, they wear them proudly. They try to look as best they can anyway, then troop to work.

When their co-workers and friends ask them about their eyebags, they joke, "Seen Kung Fu Panda? These are signs of awesomeness.  So how does this new bit of knowledge help you?

Here's an idea. The next time a guy gives you a gift, don't ask why. Don't over-analyze. Don't look for the "hidden, sinister reason" behind the gift.  He might just really like you. Simple, right? Here's the second funny fact about men:

MEN CAN'T MULTITASK.

They can't! While we can all at once think about work, the home, our friends, our hobbies, and whether or not Haley Reinhart deserved the boot in American Idol, men tend to focus on one thing at a time. It's like they were hard-wired by Mother Nature to do one thing, then move on to the next.

Ever noticed that he zones out when he's driving, or strolling, or working on his laptop? And ever notice how he sometimes sighs in exasperation when you break his concentration?

Nope, he's not mad at you -- it's just his normal reaction to getting jarred out of the way Mother Nature designed him to think!

Unfortunately, some women ask, "What's wrong?" and "I know something's wrong, why won't you tell me?" and "So that's your game, huh? You express your exasperation without telling me why? Well, two can play this game."

Don't make that mistake. I know we don't really mean it when we say "I'm okay." But when he says he's okay, trust me -- he's OKAY!  Now let's move on to something a little more serious...

FOR MEN, LOVE ISN'T ENOUGH.

For us, if we love him, and if he loves us back, then that's enough to start a new relationship. Unfortunately, men don't think that way.  Love is just one of the factors he considers when he's looking for a life partner -- there are many others!

For instance, a man also looks at your personality, your background, your work, your goals, and your dreams (among!). He's going to see if you'd be a good fit in his own life.  That's why if he realizes you're the type who wants to change him "for the better," you're in trouble!

Does he see you as an easy woman to deal with? Can he help you reach your goals and dreams? Will he want to? Will you fit well into his life, and even improve it?

Those are some of the important questions that every man asks, so don't make the mistake of thinking "all you need is love!"  And here's another bombshell...

MEN APPRECIATE RESPECT MORE THAN LOVE

Another side-effect of the "all you need is love" misconception is this... Do men need love? Yes. But love isn't enough!They want something deeper, something they appreciate more than just love. They want to feel like they're the MAN in the relationship -- strong, determined, and in charge.  In other words, they want your RESPECT!

They want to feel respected by the woman in their lives. If you don't (or can't) respect them, then they won't love you.  They need your support. They need your trust. They look for your femininity -- something his friends could never offer.

Unfortunately, many of us make the mistake of thinking men need the same things we do. And that's why we get frustrated when, even if we shower them with tons of love, they don't seem to love us back.

If we only knew that they appreciated respect a bit more, then we wouldn't be so frustrated -- and our relationships would go much more smoothly! See? When you understand the male mind, you avoid tons of the problems that most other women encounter in their love lives!  Finally, let's talk about the last hard-to-believe fact about men:

MEN DON'T LISTEN TO CRITICISM.

Every wondered why men don't listen to you when you nag them, or when you offer "constructive criticism?"  It's simply because they don't take well to any criticism AT ALL!

We women listen to criticism well, and we sometimes expect men to do the same. Unfortunately, that's not the case.  Men take criticism badly. When they're criticized, they feel incompetent.

And instead of trying to fix the problem, they tend to put some distance between you.  Do you really want that?

So instead of criticizing him, heap praises on him whenever he does something you like. He'll respond much more warmly, and will take steps to improve himself, by himself.  No nagging required!