Saturday, April 6, 2013

Emergency Kit That Every Girl Should Have

Seiring dengan berjalannya waktu dan bertambahnya usia, saya semakin 'sadar' akan pentingnya menyederhanakan hidup agar lebih mudah.  Saya tergolong orang yang sangat menyukai keteraturan, dan kerapihan lingkungan.  Maka di rumah, saya paling suka menata/mengorganized barang-barang atau alat-alat rumah tangga, menata kamar, hingga isi tas saya.  Nah ngomong-ngomong soal isi tas, saya mendapatkan sebuah inspirasi dari sebuah laman tentang bagaimana seharusnya seorang wanita mengantisipasi berbagai macam keadaan darurat dan barang-barang apa saja yang sebaiknya ada di dalam tas kita.  Ini nih contohnya ibu-ibu..silahkan dipersiapkan benda-benda apa saja yang akan menolong kita suatu hari nanti.


 1. Pantyliner and sanitary napkins, ini harus ada selalu didalam tas kita just in case..
 2. Obat-obatan, seperti handsaplast, betadine, obat sakit kepala, kayu putih, balsem aromateraphy.
 3. Ballpoint, atau alat tulis lainnya.
 4. Gunting kuku
 5. Power glue, untuk merekatkan aksesoris dsb.
 6. Tissue basah, tissue kering.
 7. Tusuk gigi
 8. Cottonbut, untuk mengoreksi make up.
 9. Safetypin, dan jarum pentul untuk merapikan pakaian atau kerudung.
10. Benang warna hitam, coklat, dan putih serta jarum jahit.
11. USB, untuk menyimpan data.
12. Minyak wangi favorit.
13. Kapas.
14. Cermin kecil.
15. Permen pelega tenggorokan.

And..tadaa!! So neat isn't it? Tempatkan semua itu kedalam sebuah dompet seperti ini..

Semua itu saya masukkan masing-masing kedalam ziplock supaya rapih dan tidak berceceran. Tinggal masukkan ke dalam tas untuk bergabung bersama teman-temannya yang lain seperti payung, perlengkapan make up, dompet, mukena, dan gadget-gadgetmu.  You're ready anytime!

Smartphone Support For My Tab

Senangnyaa menemukan alat support untuk gadget-gadgetku.  Smarphone holder ini aku beli dari sebuah supermarket dengan harga Rp. 29000,- :)


Trial And Error Mommy

Yang namanya membesarkan anak laki-laki itu susah-susah gampang ya Bloggers..Yah tahu sendiri anak laki-laki itu karakternya memang agak slebor, agak sulit diatur, jiwanya bebas, and so on..Dalam hal penerapan disiplinnya agak membuat saya sedikit pusing, sebab kondisi saya yang single parent dan perannya adalah seorang ibu, posisi saya ini sebagai orang tua adalah yang paling lemah, makanya dalam hal penerapan disiplin pada Darren pun masih trial dan error.  

Kalau anak perempuan itu kan agak mudah ya dalam mendidiknya, karena menurut saya anak perempuan itu lebih fokus, dan penurut dibanding anak laki-laki.  Dan saya paham bahwa yang namanya anak laki-laki itu paling tidak suka dicereweti, tapi tidak juga bisa hanya dibilang sekali dan langsung nurut pada permintaan orang tuanya.  Otomatis saya suka lupa dengan aturan-aturan pada diri sendiri untuk tidak menggunakan cara-cara yang "cerewet" pada anak saya.  Maklumlah, Darren itu anaknya paling tidak bisa dibilangi hanya sekali saja.  Mulai dari perkataan lemah lembut, hingga pada kata-kata keras barulah dia jalan melakukan apa yang saya perintahkan.  

Ada kebiasaan-kebiasaan kecil yang selalu dilewatkan oleh anak saya yang sering membuat saya terkadang kesal.  Seperti lupa menutup pasta giginya, atau membuka pakaiannya dilantai dan lupa memasukkan pakaian kotornya kedalam keranjang laundry.  Makanya untuk hal-hal seperti ini saya punya cara yang belum pernah terpikirkan sebelumnya dan semoga ini adalah cara yang tepat, untuknya mempelajari kebiasaan-kebiasaan yang baik sehari-hari.


Tulisan ini sengaja saya taruh di atas wastafel supaya dapat ia baca ketika dia mencuci tangan atau sedang menyikat giginya di siang atau malam hari.

Friday, April 5, 2013

Mindfulness, Compassion & Deep Listening: From Oprah Winfrey's Interview with Thich Nhat Hanh, 2012

Good link..An interviewed between Oprah and Thich Nhat Hanh.


Oprah: Okay. We've been talking about mindfulness, and you've mentioned mindful walking. How does that work?

Nhat Hanh: As you walk, you touch the ground mindfully, and every step can bring you solidity and joy and freedom. Freedom from your regret concerning the past, and freedom from your fear about the future.

Oprah: Most people when they're walking are thinking about where they have to go and what they have to do. But you would say that removes us from happiness.

Nhat Hanh: People sacrifice the present for the future. But life is available only in the present. That is why we should walk in such a way that every step can bring us to the here and the now.

Oprah: What if my bills need to be paid? I'm walking, but I'm thinking about the bills.

Nhat Hanh: There is a time for everything. There is a time when I sit down, I concentrate myself on the problem of my bills, but I would not worry before that. One thing at a time. We practice mindful walking in order to heal ourselves, because walking like that really relieves our worries, the pressure, the tension in our body and in our mind.

Oprah: The case is the same for deep listening, which I've heard you refer to.

Nhat Hanh: Deep listening is the kind of listening that can help relieve the suffering of another person. You can call it compassionate listening. You listen with only one purpose: to help him or her to empty his heart. Even if he says things that are full of wrong perceptions, full of bitterness, you are still capable of continuing to listen with compassion. Because you know that listening like that, you give that person a chance to suffer less. If you want to help him to correct his perception, you wait for another time. For now, you don't interrupt. You don't argue. If you do, he loses his chance. You just listen with compassion and help him to suffer less. One hour like that can bring transformation and healing.

Oprah: I love this idea of deep listening, because often when someone comes to you and wants to vent, it's so tempting to start giving advice. But if you allow the person just to let the feelings out, and then at another time come back with advice or comments, that person would experience a deeper healing. That's what you're saying.

Nhat Hanh: Yes. Deep listening helps us to recognize the existence of wrong perceptions in the other person and wrong perceptions in us. The other person has wrong perceptions about himself and about us. And we have wrong perceptions about ourselves and the other person. And that is the foundation for violence and conflict and war. The terrorists, they have the wrong perception. They believe that the other group is trying to destroy them as a religion, as a civilization. So they want to abolish us, to kill us before we can kill them. And the antiterrorist may think very much the same way—that these are terrorists and they are trying to eliminate us, so we have to eliminate them first. Both sides are motivated by fear, by anger, and by wrong perception. But wrong perceptions cannot be removed by guns and bombs. They should be removed by deep listening, compassionate listening, and loving space.

Oprah: The only way to end war is communication between people.

Nhat Hanh: Yes. We should be able to say this: "Dear friends, dear people, I know that you suffer. I have not understood enough of your difficulties and suffering. It's not our intention to make you suffer more. It is the opposite. We don't want you to suffer. But we don't know what to do and we might do the wrong thing if you don't help us to understand. So please tell us about your difficulties. I'm eager to learn, to understand." We have to have loving speech. And if we are honest, if we are true, they will open their hearts. Then we practice compassionate listening, and we can learn so much about our own perception and their perception. Only after that can we help remove wrong perception. That is the best way, the only way, to remove terrorism.

Oprah: But what you're saying also applies to difficulties between yourself and family members or friends. The principle is the same, no matter the conflict.

Nhat Hanh: Right. And peace negotiations should be conducted in that manner. When we come to the table, we shouldn't negotiate right away. We should spend time walking together, eating together, making acquaintance, telling each other about our own suffering, without blame or condemnation. It takes maybe one, two, three weeks to do that. And if communication and understanding are possible, negotiation will be easier. So if I am to organize a peace negotiation, I will organize it in that way.

Oprah: Is there ever a place for anger?

Nhat Hanh: Anger is the energy that people use in order to act. But when you are angry, you are not lucid, and you might do wrong things. That is why compassion is a better energy. And the energy of compassion is very strong. We suffer. That is real. But we have learned not to get angry and not to allow ourselves to be carried by anger. We realize right away that that is fear. That is corruption.

Oprah: What if in a moment of mindfulness you are being challenged? For instance, the other day someone presented me with a lawsuit, and it's hard to feel happy when somebody is going to be taking you to court.

Nhat Hanh: The practice is to go to the anxiety, the worry—

Oprah: The fear. First thing that happens is that fear sets in, like, What am I going to do?

Nhat Hanh: So you recognize that fear. You embrace it tenderly and look deeply into it. And as you embrace your pain, you get relief and you find out how to handle that emotion. And if you know how to handle the fear, then you have enough insight in order to solve the problem. The problem is to not allow that anxiety to take over. When these feelings arise, you have to practice in order to use the energy of mindfulness to recognize them, embrace them, look deeply into them. It's like a mother when the baby is crying. Your anxiety is your baby. You have to take care of it. You have to go back to yourself, recognize the suffering in you, embrace the suffering, and you get relief. And if you continue with your practice of mindfulness, you understand the roots, the nature of the suffering, and you know the way to transform it.

Oprah: You use the word suffering a lot. I think many people think suffering is dire starvation or poverty. But when you speak of suffering, you mean what?

Nhat Hanh: I mean the fear, the anger, the despair, the anxiety in us. If you know how to deal with that, then you'll be able to handle problems of war and poverty and conflicts. If we have fear and despair in us, we cannot remove the suffering in society.

Oprah: The nature of Buddhism, as I understand it, is to believe that we are all pure and radiant at our core. And yet we see around us so much evidence that people are not acting from a place of purity and radiance. How do we reconcile that?

Nhat Hanh: Well, happiness and suffering support each other. To be is to inter-be. It's like the left and the right. If the left is not there, the right cannot be there. The same is true with suffering and happiness, good and evil. In every one of us there are good seeds and bad. We have the seed of brotherhood, love, compassion, insight. But we have also the seed of anger, hate, dissent.

Oprah: That's the nature of being human.

Nhat Hanh: Yes. There is the mud, and there is the lotus that grows out of the mud. We need the mud in order to make the lotus.

Oprah: Can't have one without the other.

Nhat Hanh: Yes. You can only recognize your happiness against the background of suffering. If you have not suffered hunger, you do not appreciate having something to eat. If you have not gone through a war, you don't know the value of peace. That is why we should not try to run away from one thing after another thing. Holding our suffering, looking deeply into it, we find a way to happiness.

Video from interview:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyUxYflkhzo

Open In Love And Acceptance

You are commanded to love everyone, not condemn those who don't agree with you. Your opinions are just that, - opinions, regardless of where you got them from. They are tiny, a speck compared to the immensity of God. You cannot possibly have even the faintest idea of what God commands to other people, to other lifeforms. Your only possible intelligent choice is to continuously open in love and acceptance. Today more than yesterday.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Me And The Unfortunate Young Men

Aku percaya terkadang Allah mengirim seorang malaikat untuk menguji keikhlasanku.  Atau mungkin juga Allah mengutusku untuk menjadi malaikat bagi seseorang. Hari ini, aku belajar untuk menjadi seorang malaikat bagi seseorang yang diutus-Nya.  Dan semoga orang ini benar-benar utusan-Nya untuk menguji keikhlasanku.  Lillahi Ta'ala..Hanya Dia yang Maha Mengetahui.

Learn to love..

Learn To Forgive

Once, two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey they had an argument, and one friend slapped the other one in the face.

The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand: TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE.

They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to cool off and take a bath. The one who had been slapped somehow got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but fortunately his friend saved him.

After he recovered from the incident, he found a large stone and carved on it: TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE.

The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, “After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you carve on a stone, why?”

The other friend replied “When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away.

But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it.” ♥

SUBHAN ALLAH! When we're badly hurt by someone who we never thought would ever hurt us, forgiving is never easy...nor is forgetting... but till when do we want to live in anger and resentment? Does it benefit us? No! So let's learn...Learn to forgive and somehow forget too... even Rasulullaah (sallAllahu 'alyhi wa sallam) who had been treated badly by the Quraish..., forgave every single one of them in the end. So, let's learn from him, copy him and take the bold step. Let's forgive and forget - Let's learn to write on sand and let the wind of forgiveness blow the hurt and anger away! :)
Sumber: I love Allah Facebook.

Monday To Friday Lunchbox

Setiap pagi pekerjaan pertama yang dilakukanku adalah membuat sarapan anak, dan menyiapkan bekal makan siangnya (lunchbox).  Yah seperti inilah isinya, sederhana saja yang penting habis dan dia tidak perlu jajan di luar.

 Senin

 Selasa

 Rabu

 Kamis

Jumat

It Is Also Important To Know What You Do Not Want.

Sometimes when you go through a period of great difficulty and struggle, it is so that you can finally realize what you do NOT want in your life. Then finally, at long last, you can embrace what you DO want.

Monday, April 1, 2013

You Were Created To Be Alive

You weren't made to simply survive until you die. Live it up, embrace life. This entire planet exists for all God's creatures, - and that includes you. Don't wait to start living, begin right now, with your very next breath. There are many wonderful experiences waiting for you, so get going.

Saturday, March 30, 2013

Trust In God

When an impossible must happen, put it on God's to-do list. Well, if you can't make it happen, and no one else can, there is only thing left to do, - finally look up and trust in God to make it right.

Thursday, March 28, 2013

You Face It

You have to face problems however difficult they are. Having the bravery to face your difficulties is the hardest step; working through the problem is often easier than you think. The first step is always the hardest.

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Mendaur Ulang Yuk!

Proyek lain kami (saya dan anak saya) dari mendaur ulang adalah bahan-bahan yang berasal dari kaleng-kaleng bekas susu, sardin, atau makanan kaleng lain yang disulap menjadi tempat stationary seperti ballpoint dan pinsil-pinsil.  Gunakan kertas kado bekas, atau cat sesuai dengan kreatifitas kita.  Lumayankan..


Paper Toilet Monsters

Lagi senang-senangnya mendaur ulang bekas-bekas perlengkapan rumah tangga sekaligus mengasah kreatifitas anak seperti ini.  Monster dari kertas roll tissue yang sudah habis, kumpulkan hias dengan guntingan kertas berwarna dan tempel sesuai imajinasi anak.  Ini dia hasil karya anak saya..:)

  Rrrawwrr..hohoho..I am mr. monster..

 Meja belajarmu yang acak-acakan..

Yang ini nggak jelas dia monster apa..katanya sih ini mr.planctonnya spongebob squarepants:) It more looks like monster berhidung merah yang sedang senyum..ahahah..:))

Kayaknya harus punya rak khusus untuk memajang hasil karyanya.  Gimana?

Hey hoo..mr monster got new fellas..


You've Got What It Takes

God won't give you more than you can handle. Although there may have been times you thought the world was caving in on you, you got through it. You are much stronger than you think and with God's power, you are stronger than you can imagine. So charge ahead, you can handle it.

Sunday, March 24, 2013

You Are The Gardener Of Your Soul.

Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of expecting someone else to leave you wilted flowers.

His First Pet

Yes it's Sunday again! Waktunya belanja murah di pasar Punclut, Bandung!  Kali ini anakku pulang membawa dua ekor ikan emas.  Tapi sayang, baru saja ditaruh di fountain kami, ikan pasangannya tiba-tiba hilang dimakan kucing..Jadi, si chiki (nama yang Darren beri) kesepian deh.  Ya sudahlah nak, yuk kita pindahkan di tempat yang lebih aman.  Gimana kalau di meja belajarmu sayang? Yah..belajarlah untuk menyayangi hewan piaraanmu Darren!  Jangan lupa selalu beri dia makan ya.  Ini adalah hewan peliharaan pertama yang dia miliki bloggers.  Ini adalah caraku mengajari dia tanggung jawab, sekaligus mengasah rasa welas asih kepada mahluk hidup. Mari kita lihat apakah ikan ini bisa bertahan lama? Semoga..:)




Saturday, March 23, 2013

No Bully Can Harm You Dear..

 Sebagai ibu saya prihatin dengan kasus 'bullying' yang sering terjadi pada anak-anak disekolah atau dilingkungan bermainnya. Dan setahu saya bully ini lebih sering terjadi pada anak laki-laki dibanding anak perempuan. Oleh sebab itu, ini adalah cara saya mengantisipasi kekerasan terhadap anak dilingkungannya:

1. Tumbuhkan rasa percaya diri pada anak lelaki kita, dengan cara menghargai dia sebagai mana dia adanya, berikan ucapan-ucapan yang membangkitkan semangatnya, mendukung, serta senantiasa bersedia mendampingi dia dalam suka dan dukanya.

2. Ajari anak lelaki kita untuk menghargai dan menghormati orang lain khususnya perasaan teman-temannya.

3.  Biarkan dia mandiri, dan tahu cara membela diri dengan benar, dukung anak untuk ikut kelas bela diri atau martial art. 

4. Tanamkan selalu perbedaan antara kebaikan dan keburukan dengan membesarkan kebaikan yang dia lakukan, dan membuat dia belajar dari keburukan yang dia lakukan. 

5. Daftarkan dia kedalam kelompok pengajian anak-anak untuk mendapatkan fondasi keimanan yang kuat.

6. Ajarkan dengan memberi contoh kepada anak lelakimu untuk melindungi dan menyayangi teman wanitanya.

7. Tanamkan pada dirinya bahwa dia layak diperlakukan baik, dan menolak untuk disakiti oleh siapapun.

8. Tanamkan kepadanya keberanian untuk mengungkapkan permasalahannya kepada kita orang tua atau dengan gurunya. Komunikasi yang intesif dengan anak. Serta jadikan diri kita sebagai orang tua yang dapat dia percaya untuk mengungkap segala hal yang menjadi uneg-unegnya.

Saya tidak rela bila anak menjadi korban bully..Menurut saya, anak yang menjadi korban bully, disebabkan karena rasa percaya diri yang rendah, dan mungkin juga karena kurangnya kasih sayang dan kesadaran orang tua dalam membentuk karakter dan kepribadian yang kuat pada anak.

Like Waters

Dalam hidup akan selalu ada seseorang yang menyakitimu dengan sengaja.  Tapi kamu adalah air yang takkan bisa dibelah oleh pedang apapun.

You Can Be An Encouragement

Everyone needs encouragement, but it's so easy to forget to take the time to give it. Think of someone in your life whom you appreciate today, or someone who made you smile, - and tell them! Even if it's a stranger, take a moment to let them know you noticed.